however improbable

iTunes prognostication meme

I haven't done a good meme in a while, but this one looked fun. Gacked from several people.

Set your iTunes to Shuffle. Use each song that comes up, in order, to answer the following questions:

Question: What do you think of me, iTunes?

Answer: Get Me Away From Here, I'm Dying - Belle & Sebastian.

Oh, and we're off to an excellent start. Thanks a lot, iTunes!

Question: Will I have a happy life?
Answer: The Cherry Tree Carol - Anonymous 4

So ... there are virgin births and strange food cravings in my future? I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound like fun to me.

Question: What do my friends really think of me?
Answer: Vision (O Euchari In Leta Via) Full Length - Hildegard von Bingen

I'm going to take that as a compliment, guys. Like, I am so awesome, you have mystical visions about me, and then write me pretty music. I know you do.

Question: Do people secretly lust after me?
Answer: Down to Nowhere - Thea Gilmore

Evidently not so much. But I don't care, apparently. So it's all good.

Question: What should I do with my life?
Answer: I Never Do Anything Twice (The Seven Percent Solution) - composed by Stephen Sondheim and performed by Judy Kaye

Ahahahahahahahaha! Okay, this is the best answer ever. Read the lyrics if you don't believe me. All kinds of kinky sex is in my future!

Question: Why must life be so full of pain?
Answer: Coward - Holly McNarland

Yeah, okay, I buy that.

Question: How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Answer: How to Say Goodbye - The Magnetic Fields

iTunes, why don't you love me? I mean, seriously. I think my iTunes is gay.

Question: Will I ever have children?
Answer: Moeity Caves - Robin Miller (Riven soundtrack)

Ooooookay. I guess I BETTER not have children, then, or they will turn into horrible narcissistic monsters.

Question: Will I die happy?
Answer: Beautiful Day - U2


Question: Can you give me some advice?
Answer: Poppies - Marcy Playground

In between having lots kinky sex, apparently, I'm going to be reinitiating the opium trade. Damn, I'm going to be BUSY.

Question: What do you think happiness is?
Answer: St. Matthew Passion, BWV 244: No. 14, Evangelist, Jesus: "Und Da Sie Den Lobgesang Gesprochen Hatten"

Happiness is listening to Bach, apparently. Oh, and I looked up a translation of the St. Matthew Passion and apparently this particular part has Jesus saying "In this same night ye will all become annoyed for my sake", which is kind of awesome.

Question: What's my favorite fetish?
Answer: Enter Basil - Henry Mancini (The Great Mouse Detective soundtrack)

My favorite fetish seems to be ... Sherlock Holmes. Well, I'm not going to argue with THAT.

Question: Am I complete freak?
Answer: Chocolate Salty Balls - Isaac Hayes (South Park)

So, in short, yes. And the fact that I have actually made Chef's chocolate salty balls on more than one occasion, and CONSUMED THEM AFTERWARDS is just one of the many pieces of evidence to support this conclusion.

Also! My fuck-off huge order from finally arrived! With the Jeeves & Wooster Megaset, the Prisoner Megaset, and a copy of Lamb: the Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal. I am all asquee.
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